#1
PTSD partner is driving, I'm attending in the back. Just before we get to hospital, he overhears following conversation in the back:
Patient: "I heard that!"
Me: "Sorry, that was meant to be internal..."
PTSD cracks up, knowing that I was spending my day in a state of VF - Violent Flatulence.
In reality, all that happened was yours truly forgetting to document something on the run sheet, and having to scribble it down hastily, muttering a quiet "shit" under his breath.
Sorry to ruin a good story like that.
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#2:
Colleague needs to listen to patients chest again with stethoscope. Colleague waits for ambulance to pull up outside of hospital, turns engine off. Driver hops in back with Colleague. Utter silence, only a slight swaying of the trees outside in the gentle breeze. Stethoscope to chest, listening to breath sounds.
Instead of hearing breath sounds, his mobile phone, located out of reach on the front dashboard, jumps to life at full volume:
I'M A TITS AND ASS MAN, I'M A TITS AND ASS MAN!
Oops.
